Epstein wasn’t just a donor but a client of Humanity+’s papa organization Alcor, whose cryogenic technology promises eternal life. If you can foot the bill, that is.

Did Jeffrey Epstein, diddler billionaire and pimp to the royal family, donate obscene sums of cash to the elite cabal which just hand-picked a presidential candidate?

Does that same collective now hold Epstein’s frozen head in their basement, awaiting his day of blasphemous resurrection?

Skrrrt! Let’s rewind a bit.

I’m a transhumanist. Hell, I’m any ist or ism which looks at the world with profound dissatisfaction. People should be better. So when Rachel Haywire, our cult leader editor, said she was seeking the nomination of the U.S. Transhumanist Party to run for President; ask not what Trigger Warning can do for you.

Gee willikers, the USTP! The party founded by Zoltan Istvan as he drove around the USA in a coffin-shaped bus protesting against death itself. After all these years, was this my tribe?

It looked that way. First glances revealed hours of podcasts, reams of written content emerging each week. Ok sure, it was all a little on the dry side; lots of policy and nothing much for the trousers but, with rose-tinted glasses, every flag looks red.

Besides, the whole thing was such a glaring, drooling no-brainer.

Ours was the culture platform. We were the dreamers of dreams. Nobody was thinking we could put our girl in the White House, but we could give ‘em the old razzle-dazzle on a global stage. We could draw serious attention to transhumanist ideas with a little showmanship.

Rachel’s vision of a tech-shepherded artistic utopia was irresistible. People would come for the futurist fantasy and stay for the hard policy. Everyone could eat, and the party would march forward with a dynamic, fascinating figurehead.

The internet agreed. Every poll, every post, every thread. It was as though America herself cried, ‘Haywire! Haywire! Give us Haywire!’

And of course, it all collapsed.

Out of nowhere, the party chairman calls a mulligan on the election. New voters, new candidates; new rules, timelines, and a new voting system. Two further debates and untold hours more podcasting. Quicker than you can say ‘Benghazi,’ the party had turned on its best hope for a platform and began to starve us out of the primary.

‘Cos you see, the wrong woman was winning. Beneath the surface of this movement lay a viper’s nest of ego, scandal, and filthy stinking money.

Credit where due, they were clever about it. No money changed hands through the USTP. They, we, were the earnest smiling face of what would soon be referred to as an immortal pedophile cult.

The establishment candidate proudly flaunted his links to Humanity+, who accepted money from Epstein long after his proclivities were high society’s open, dirty secret.

Deeper and deeper the rabbit hole went. Epstein wasn’t just a donor but a client of Humanity+’s papa organization Alcor, whose cryogenic technology promises eternal life. If you can foot the bill, that is.

Whispers spoke of more than just his head being put on ice; get a couple of the right people drunk and they might let slip that Epstein’s penis was also part of the… ahem… package.

The purges began as soon as all this came out. Discussion of the Epstein link was forbidden on party media. Heavy hitters from Humanity+ slithered into the ear of officials, and the troublemakers had to go. I was one of them, because I knew too much and suspected the rest.

By the time voting began, the primary had moved from tragedy to farce. Paper-thin Facebook accounts from Bangladesh had appeared, singing the praises of the party’s Chosen One. The 1800+ ‘registered members’ turned out to be a years-old mailing list which struggled to yield a 20% response rate. The establishment candidate beat us by 37 first-round votes.

Only then did the truth sink in: there was no party. Its legitimacy had fled with Istvan in 2016. There was no constitution, no checks and balances, and no mandate. We’d all been hoodwinked. The USTP was one man, the party chairman.

The whole thing had taken two months and the lessons were priceless. I don’t know what I expected when I signed up for this, but the taste left in my mouth isn’t sour or bitter. I don’t feel like an entryist, a troll, or an interloper. I feel more or less the same as I did. That’s the lesson and the great falling of the United States Transhumanist Party. Beholden to the global mega-rich and the festering demon of arrogant ego, it’s all so depressingly human.

And that’s where our work begins. To move forward and decentralize the conversation. To take transhumanism out of the hands of this group of elites and bring it to the people. We need to be better, and we need to be the ones who decide what better looks like.

I’d gone looking for transhumanists, androids, and cyborgs. All I found were damn dirty robots.

Nick Sobriquet is a lunatic and must be stopped! From a secure location in England’s dark heart he writes, performs, and merges occult practice with revolutionary praxis. He also blogs occasionally at Romancing Babylon.

[Editors note: While USTP officers continue to attend meetings with Humanity+ officials such as Natasha-Vita More who is on record taking 100K from Epstein, the USTP is not connected to Epstein independently. As far as we know, no USTP officers were involved with Epstein despite being influenced by Epstein-funded Humanity+ in their primary election.]